Team Ayu

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

TEAM AYU - EPILOGUE

Hello everyone! I'm Ayumi Hamasaki, the Empress of Japanese Pop music. I'll start off with answering a few questions out of character.

1. I have played once in the female series, and twice in the male. I quit the second time in the male, due to a... *disagreement* with a majority of the judges. But I played as Gemma Arterton in cycle 7, and Zachary Quinto in Male Cycle 5. I also judged as Emilie Simon in all-stars.

2. There are a few celebrities that I think will rock this. Anne Hathaway, Gwen Stefani and Charlize Theron are the three biggest threats when it comes to potential.

3. Actually, with Jamie Chung I was like "Oh my god. Why would you choose her? She has NOTHING!", and there's like... Half these people here I have never heard of before in my life. Oh I'm so sheltered!

4. I picked my celebrity because she is amazing. Beautiful, versatile and has a large portfolio.[/center]

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

TEAM AYU. - Volume 1

Konnichiwa Minna-sannnn~ O-genki desu ka~ My name is Ayumi Hamasaki, but you can call me Ayu! I have been a popular singer since 1998 and a fashion icon in Japan since then!

I am excited to be here, but I am not happy with the twist.
Troian does not have many photos. She even struggled with the smile shoot. Her smile shots scared me, but I think I helped her as much as I could.

Team Red isn't really a big threat to me. Ruby may be a surprise, but Jamie is only sexy. A model needs to be more than sexy. Besides, I will be the best Asian woman in this competition.

Team Green

[/b] may be a problem, Jennifer is beautiful, but I've never heard of Shannyn before. I don't know if they'll do well together.

Team Purple has Katy and Gwen. Both of these girls are beautiful, and have great senses of style. Admittedly, I have used both of these ladies as inspiration before. They are a big threat.

Team Pink has Miley and Sarah. I think this team will do well (OOC: Especially because I know who these people are). I do wish the best for them of course.

Team Orange is Katie and Emmy. I don't know who either of these girls are. But I'm sure they're beautiful.

Team Yellow is Jullianne and Hilary. I admire these girls a lot as actresses, and they're very beautiful. But I don't know if they'll make it very far.

Team Grey is by far the biggest threat. Anne and Charlize are really beautiful, and always look great. I am intimidated by this team.

Finally, Team Brown. Kate and Sienna. I am not familiar with either of these girls, but perhaps they will do good. I don't know.

And me and Troian... I hope we can do well. I know I can do well, but I hope I am not pulling Troian's weight along for the next three weeks.

Sayonara for now~ xxx

-Ayu-chan

[/center]

[Amanda Kimmel]

When you talked in Japanese at the start I got serious flashbacks to Japanese class... which was awesome but brutal.

If only I could remember half of it... but I do know what you said

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Team Ayu - Vol. 2

Konbanwa minna-san! Ayuready?!

So last week was the smile shoot. Troian was so lucky to have me in her team, without me, she probably would have chosen the worst photo there! But lucky for me, I have been swapped around to someone who truly appreciates the Japanese culture and beauty. That is, Gwen Stefani! I guess that's just one of the benefits of being attractive and popular, that other people know you have to team up with someone less popular than I am, so they saved me from that unholy team!


Also! What was with at call out? Ruby getting best photo? Really? How could that photo be any better than mine? I just don't get it. Mine was so much more interesting, and I'm far more attractive than she is. The only logical explanation is that the judges feel intimidated by my beauty! Why else would they not rank me anywhere near first!

Oh! Before I forget! Katy Perry's photo was god awful! I thought the photoshoot theme was meant to be a natural smile, not photoshopped every single part of the photo. I think it just really means that Katy is not as attractive as we all thought if her photos need that much more editing! I mean, take a look at this


I have come to the conclusion that she is in fact really unattractive, and shouldn't be popular as a result (And is probably actually a man due to her pecs). Good thing she's paired with Troian now!

Anna totally owned Charlize at panel! That was the single most amazing moment of this cycle so far! I must say, I really like how detailed her critiques are. But oh my god. Charlize totally got it! It was so amazing! Speaking of Team Grey. Do you know who Anne Hathaway looked like?

....


Mortisha Addams! *eeeek* That's so horrible. Addams family smiles are SCARY! It looked like she wanted to kill us! Oh my god!

Speaking of scary smiles. Emmy has a scary one too! She's such a brain! That is a huge no-no in the world of popularity. But I guess she's cute in a brain sort of way.

Also! JAMIE CHUNG! OH MY GOOOOOOOD! That was scary! And the sad thing was... That wasn't even the worst smile in the bunch! Of course that went to Hilary! That was so awful! And two less people to worry about!

As for this week's shoot! I'm excited to work with Gwen! Woo! She's almost as attractive and popular as I am, but we have ran into a problem, and that is I have nothing for autumn, and her best photo is for spring! Damn it! I really wanted to use that winter photo. Oh well, next time!

Love Ayu-chan

xxxx

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Team Ayu. Volume 3

Form a mob and get the pitchforks and torches! We have some lynching to do! The lynching is that of Team Orange! They split up the nice alliance that Team Pink and Team Blue had! What's worse, they put one Miley with Troian! What's much more worse is that Troian has one cover, and it sucks sooo much! I'm going to lose a friend in this competition because of those bitches! Granted it was a good strategic move to split up one of the strongest teams into the weakest teams, but oh my god. I want to slap a bitch!



And panel, that was so close to getting Troian and Katy eliminated. Those two are the biggest posers, and they only pretend to be popular And eliminating Jennifer? I mean she's pretty popular, and her photo was really good this week, and Troian and Katy's weren't good at all! Yet they still stayed! Much more rage!

Look at those rankings! I'm really surprised that I did so well there! But still, I've noticed that generally, the further down the list you go, the more high-fashioned it becomes. Well, until you get to last place, which was just horrible. I can't believe she submitted that photo! But she's gone now, so I guess that's good.

Sarah and Gwen's photos were majorly under rated by the judges! I guess they were just too avant garde for their tastes. I mean, their critiques... I wear jackets in spring all the time, it gets pretty cool in spring! Heck! Even in summer I wear jackets if it's a cool day, or even in the evening! And winter isn't all snow and freezing! Besides, I'd definitely wear something like that dress in the winter! Sometimes you must sacrifice things for the sake of good fashion!

As for magazine covers! Wow! I have so many good ones, both high fashion and commercial. I think Gwen and I have this shoot in th bag! Assuming Miley and Troian actually survive this, I'm changing Sarah and Miley into the same team again! PINK/BLUE ALLIANCE FOREVER!

See you again~
xxxxxxx
Ayu-chan!

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Team Ayu - Vol. 3

I am sooo happy Miley stayed! But so bummed Troian stayed. But I guess that's the catch 22 about this situation. But ohohoho! Emmy's got it now! She's going to pay dearly for messing up our alliance, especially since it seems Miley may have extended it to Team Grey. I guess we'll know who our top 6 is now! But I will surely reign supreme out of the lot of them!~

Can we talk about Sienna's photo? I mean seriously, Gwen's photo last week was very similar in the face, and her outfit was a lot more interesting than that, and yet the judges HATED it. Meanwhile, we look at Sienna's photo this week, and the judges showered it in an orgasm of compliments! That face was just plain scary! Not to mention she's really the one that looked like a monster! Seriously, what are those judges on this week? Ranking THAT above MY beautiful masterpiece!

Also, I was under the impression we were doing one high fashion and one commercial for each duo. Meanwhile, Anne and Charlize submitted two high fashion photos. A smile =/= commercial. If I had have known we could submit one photo that was more high fashion than another, and pass it off as commercial, I would have done that! And yes, for that, I'm calling cheating, and undeserved first duo call out!

One more thing! This photoshoot is so stupid. Ugh. It's just so stressful to do because it's like... Really confusing. It confuses and angers me! Well not so much angers, but confuses to the point where I get angry! Sigh AYU-BOTS READY FOR ACTION! Close this off for me, I'm too angry.



Love Ayu-bot.

[Amanda Kimmel]

Bitch bitch bitch...

Gwen had an ugly jacket. That thing almost made my eyes bleed. That was why we all hated it.

Anne's cover was both high fashion and commercial. And you seriously don't think smiling is commercial? You're nuts.

I will make sure to lock this topic as requested once I am not on my phone.

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Uuuuh. I was telling my Ayubots to close my confessional off for me. (As in the LOVE AYUBOT part)

My comment was a smile does not automatically make it commercial. Likewise, a neutral expression doesn't make it high fashion. I was saying Just because Anne's smiling, doesn't mean it's commercial.

[Joan Rivers]

This is the best confessional any of the models have done! Good job! Keep it up! I love how sassy you are!

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Team Ayu. - Vol. 4

AYUBOT ACTIVATED


SUBJECT: TEAM AYUBOT BLOG
PRIMARY FUNCTION: Record AYUBOTs findings on these photos.

Photoshoot theme - Sisterhood. RELATED MATCHES FOUND:

Sister Act
Family counseling
List of lesbian sex positions
Black women in the ghetto
Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves
Jake Shears
People who look like they are related

TARGET FOUND. ANALYSING PANEL NUMBER 4.



ANALYSES COMPLETED. RECORDING FINDINGS.

ANALYSIS: TEAM GREY.

MOTHER AND DAUGHTER. Polar opposites. 50% chance of being related through marriage only.

CONCLUSION: AVOID STEP-MOTHER AT ALL COSTS.

ANALYSIS: TEAM ORANGE

35% CHANCE OF RELATION. Cousins. OLDER ONE NEEDS TO ACQUIRE NEW MAKE UP ARTIST.

CONCLUSION: AVOID ELDEST AT ALL COSTS.

ANALYSIS: TEAM PURPLE


PROBABILITY OF RELATION: HIGH. Detection notations of lazy sister syndrome. Research concludes one person did all the work.

CONCLUSION: DESTROY LAZY TEAM MEMBER. READYING ARMY OF AYUBOT ASSISTANTS



TARGET ACQUIRED. FIRING LASERS. MISS.

Orders: Get her next time.

ANALYSIS: TEAM PINK

COMPLETE MESS. 67% probability of relation. SMALL PICTURE IS WEAKEST LINK.

CONCLUSION: AVOID WEAKEST LINK.

ANALYSIS: TEAM BROWN

HATS. HIDDEN BEHIND HATS. CANNOT ANALYSE RELATIONSHIPS

CONCLUSION: HATS.

Current photoshoot theme: Sexy. SEARCHING FOR TERM "Sexy"


SHOWING RESULTS FOR "sexy"

Playboy
Porn
Betty White
Why can't I find a girlfriend?
Pepper Spray
How to be sexy
Homosexuality in the bible
Being sexy is being free

TARGET FOUND

ANALYSING COMBINATION: GWEN STEFANI + AYUMI HAMASAKI.



ANALYSIS COMPLETE.

CONCLUSION: HIGH QUALITY SEXY PHOTOS FOUND. Probability to succeed into next round: 90%.

TASK COMPLETED. STRIKE A POSE



AYUBOT
X X X X X X

[Bethany Joy Galeotti]

Wow!! What is that LOL

[Amanda Kimmel]

That was one of the best confessional posts I have read in ages.

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Team Ayu - Vol. 5


Helloooooo everyone!



I'm back from a well deserved break while my henchbot, Ayubot took my place. Ayubot may be back next time I get too angry, but let's hope that isn't soon. It costs a fortune to power that robot!

Let's start off here. I'm sooo sick of Team Grey getting best photo, and Charlize getting the best photo! I mean GEEZ! Give me a break! I hope Charlize takes a huge stumble, and clears the stairwell to the top for me! I'm going to do all I can, take the risks, choose my best photo for the best shoots. But I digress, let's look at these photos. Anna's photo was soooo plain! It's sooooo not sexy. Unless plain Jane is sexy. As for Charlize, yes I see the sexy in the eyes, but it's sooo safe. Overall, I feel Team Grey were too grey.

Excuse me while I skip to Miss Emmy. First she disses my girl Sarah, then she steals that second call out from me with a picture of her lips pursed like her coke is made of lemon juice. There are sexier ways to look like you're drinking coke.

What in the hell was Katy thinking? She has soooo many sexier photos. I don't understand the reasoning behind this photo... As for her partner... .... Troian... She's not popular enough. Maybe if people liked her, they'd want to see her cleavage too. That being said, I know for a fact that she has a better sexy photo than that. Bad choice.

I am also getting the feeling that the judges have it out for Gwenny Gwen-Gwen. And I don't like it, not one bit. Even if she submits a good photo, she still doesn't go over well with the judges. Don't worry Gwenny Gwen-Gwen, I'll save you as long as these duos exist!

Speaking of that, I thought we were going to be judged and ranked as singles, what happened to that? Sooooo confusing. But at least I still get to work with my Gwen. Now that's someone who understands my logic!

Well that's all for now! So long~

Love Ayu-chan. <3
xxxxxx

[Amanda Kimmel]

Gwen posted a poor photo this last round. I'm beginning to believe that you are of the assumption that you and your partner can do no wrong. Guess what? It is that assumption which is wrong. Stop making accusations. We have the final word.

[Ayumi Hamasaki]

Uuuuuuh. You're far too sensitive. Lighten up, it's all in good fun.